Tomorrow I turn 50. I wanted to share some of the most important things I’ve learned - in the course of a half-century - with my sons so I started sorting, writing and editing. I’ve decided to share the results with anyone who is interested. Click here to download My 50 Best Lessons from 50 Years of Living.

I hope you enjoy these lessons and I’d like to invite you to post the most important lessons you’ve learned.

Is it possible too read too much? Yes, if reading prevents you from thinking.

Passive reading can be a substitute for the harder work of thinking and learning. We fool ourselves if we think a large input of ideas will necessarily benefit us. Until we digest those ideas and ultimately apply them, then reading is of little value.

Abraham Lincoln was a leader known for deep reflection. His law partner and biographer William Herndon said that “Lincoln read less and thought more than any man in his sphere in American.”

When Lincoln was President there was far less published than there is today; still, he could have chosen to be a voracious reader. His strength wasn’t in the limits of his reading but the depth of his thinking.

What can you eliminate in your schedule today that will enable you to do more thinking?

I had lunch with the mayor of a major city yesterday. He is a democrat. He is also innovative, charming and erudite.

He said he targeted getting big companies into his city because he believed they could be generous donors to worthwhile causes and charities.

“Mayor,” I said, “that sounds like a Republican sentiment.”

“That’s why my party calls me a bad Democrat,” he replied with a grin.

When it is good to be bad? This is an example. In the current two party political spectrum bad democrats and bad republicans often end up as centrists, or social liberals and fiscal conservatives or visa versa.

Frankly, I like these mold-breaking departures. I’m tired of both parties, and I belong to one of ‘em.

In leadership, it is easy to fall into a category that can trap you as well as define you. The Mayor is, in my opinion, an excellent leader because he refuses to let that happen. He is also a world-class consensus builder who has brought people of different views and beliefs together to do great things for the community.

Too bad he isn’t running for president.

Yesterday at Starbucks I had spread out my newspaper on the footstool in front of the comfy chair I was using. When my coffee order came up, I walked a few feet to retrieve it. A woman and her four kids piled into my chair and the chairs nearby.

I walked back over kind of expecting the woman to figure out I’d been sitting there but she ignored me. I actually said, “Excuse me” as I gathered up my stuff and relocated. She was oblivious.

In the scheme of things it wasn’t a big deal. But it is indicative of the decline of civility. Stuff like that (and the woman talking on her cell phone who cut off two lanes of traffic to turn left from the far right lane) hit my buttons.

Part of me wants to politely say something like, “Excuse me, but you’ve taken my seat.” That wouldn’t be rude but I’m not sure it would be helpful. It takes a great deal of optimism to think that somehow people like the woman and her brood might gain some insight.

Instead, and against my own lower nature, I decided that the antidote to behavior that isn’t civil is…civility. To rise above without feeling superior, to recognize the rampant self-absorption and distraction in our culture and ultimately to recall the words of Phileo Judaeus who said, “Be kind, everyone is fighting a hard battle.”

Thanks to my friend Joe Scarlett for sending the following:

During this political season let’s be reminded of these wise words:

You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich.
You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down.
You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
You cannot build character and courage by taking away men’s initiative and independence.
You cannot help men permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves.

Who said it? Abraham Lincoln

Darla and I went to see the new Adam Sandler movie “You Don’t Mess with the Zohan.” I love good comedy–sometimes even dumb comedy–and I’m  no prude, but I was do disappointed with bits going over the top from funny to crass that I wanted to leave. My wife is an optimist, one of the many things I love about her, and she kept hoping it would be better but she eventually gave up and we left.

As I’m about to turn 50, I am increasingly unwilling to waste any of my life. If a movie sucks, walk out. If a book disappoints, quit reading. If an event is deadly dull, don’t stay. Of course consideration in social situations should be given to others, but when it is ultimately your time, choose not to waste it.

We did get our money back for the movie, but I didn’t care: life is too short to sit through a bad movie because you paid for the tickets.

1. Get healthier

Eat smaller portions
Eat 5-6 times daily
Stay hydrated
Aim for a minimum of 30 minutes of physical activity if you’re really serious,

2. Call a past customer and ask what you could do to get him or her back.

3. Send a thank you note.

4. Write a personal note of encouragement to someone on your team.

5. Plan your day the night before or first thing in the morning.

6. Schedule accomplishment, not activity.

7. Read, study, pray for the first 30 minutes of each day.

8. Do one intentional act of kindness for a family member, friend or stranger.

9. End the day remembering all the good things that happened.

10. Tell someone you love them.

Some of my least favorite junk mail includes requests with the phrase “…please don’t break the chain.” Those words alone cause me to delete the email. It shows a lack of intelligence and/or effort on the part of the sender.

Keeping “the chain” or any chain intact is not on my daily list of things to do. First, it isn’t a chain; it is an unasked for email or letter. Second, if I didn’t request it, I have no responsibility to keep the chain going. Third, the only thing worse is the veiled threat and/or genie payoff: “Bob broke the chain and his leg fell off” or “Jill kept the chain and someone gave her a new car.”

When you request anything, in writing or verbally, make your request compelling and leave it to intelligent people to decide to comply or deny. If it is worthwhile, most will comply. If it isn’t, using “the chain” isn’t going to invoke any higher-order life form to help. That only works on the superstitious.

(Sponsored by the Freedom from Stupidity Foundation)

The Freedom from Religion Foundation has sponsored some billboards across the U.S. that say “Imagine no religion.”

That’s pretty easy. Imagine millions of hours of effort and billions of dollars of aid donated by faith-based organizations suddenly gone.

Imagine tens of thousands of homeless people with no shelter because missions are closed, and as many hungry people who no longer have any food that used to be delivered by people of faith.

Or just go back to Adolph Hitler–there was a guy who believed in the supremacy of man free from the bounds of religion.

Here’s my problem: my faith isn’t threatened by billboards, and I’m up for whatever intelligent discussion might be created. But I am irritated by trickery.

FfRF says it is dedicated to separation of church and state. That is freedom OF religion, not freedom FROM religion.

Personally, I’m all for freedom FROM stupidity because I see much more damage being done by stupidity than misguided religion. Unfortunately my freedom FROM anything means restricting somebody else, in this case the stupid. And it also sets me up as judge and ruler: who am I to judge what is stupid and what is not?

Since I believe in freedom OF speech instead of freedom FROM speech, I’ll support your right to a billboard. But be honest about your objectives, “free thinkers” as you call yourselves, and acknowledge that your desired freedom requires the suppression of what others believe.

I’ve gotten along fine all these years with those I disagree with and never started a campaign to free myself from them. Seems like agreeing to disagree isn’t enough from the Freedom from Religion folks.

Now that it appears Obama has locked up the democratic nomination, it is important to give careful consideration to his qualifications, not just his ideas (and the same is true for McCain).

Although a political activist prior, he was first elected to public office in 1996. From first elected office to president in 12 years? Doesn’t seem right to me. Think about it. (I’m sure some of my readers will be able to enlighten my about other recent presidents who have had less experience when elected. Feel free to let me know.)

Obama is eloquent, I’ll give him that. He is woefully informed on business and international policy (my opinion, but made after carefully considering his positions). In a perfect world a president should have both style and substance; in an imperfect world, I’ll take substance over style any day.

“Motivational speaker” is often used negatively when substance is perceived to be lacking, regardless of style. Charisma can be used for good or bad. Focusing only on speaking ability and charisma is a poor way to elect a leader.

At the end of the day, you might still like what Obama stands for and more importantly, what you think he can do if elected president. I’ve got no quibble. Disagreement is part of the political process. But whenever it comes time to vote or support any leader, consider the substance of his or her experience and not just the style of his or her communication skills. Experience is important.